LOL Chuck... I submitted my planner in (I believe it was) my first post in the thread.. Everything from them on was sheer entertainment value!
(okay, and killing time)
(okay, and killing time)
Soundstogo,
Foist tings foist, Don't presume to know that to which have not seen or have reliable proof.
While experience is certainly not the only gauge by which to judge the claims of success, a prudent man would give more credence to the source with both quality AND quantity. It is simple logic.
I care not that you have more or less, but if you have more and have always found your method successful, then that would lend more value to your position.
But if you have, Oh I don't know, say 1/5th the experience of another, and your position is contrary to the more experienced method, logic dictates that the more experienced methodology has been exposed to 5xs more opportunity to fail or succeed and the results have to be more reliable. Scientific method has established just such a practice.
Chuck,
Please note that the evolutionary path of all threads is educational and unavoidable.
The truly uninteresting ones usually end with "BUMP" at post #2.
Foist tings foist, Don't presume to know that to which have not seen or have reliable proof.
While experience is certainly not the only gauge by which to judge the claims of success, a prudent man would give more credence to the source with both quality AND quantity. It is simple logic.
I care not that you have more or less, but if you have more and have always found your method successful, then that would lend more value to your position.
But if you have, Oh I don't know, say 1/5th the experience of another, and your position is contrary to the more experienced method, logic dictates that the more experienced methodology has been exposed to 5xs more opportunity to fail or succeed and the results have to be more reliable. Scientific method has established just such a practice.
Chuck,
Please note that the evolutionary path of all threads is educational and unavoidable.
The truly uninteresting ones usually end with "BUMP" at post #2.
I have been in the DJ game since 1974 and have always allowed things to happen when the time is right. I share this thought with my Brides and of course set up a loose guideline for time. We definitely make sure dinner is worked pretty close to accurate time. Last nights gig we ended up giving the caterers an extra 15 to complete setup for buffet. No worries my Bride didnt stress at all and was oblivious as I was in constant communication with the banquet captain. Fast forward pictures took longer than planned so tradition was negated and guests were fed and then dessert and the B&G finally had their GE. We were under time constraints due to early venue time of 11 pm and so we deleted the Family dance and invited the parents part way through the first dance as the Groom wasnt much into dancing much less alone in the spotlight. We danced like crazy for 1.5 hours much less than a typical BC wedding but all were pleased the Bride tipped me 200 and thanked me for helping make her day perfect.
Other than dinner no time guidelines other than the venue closing time.
Other than dinner no time guidelines other than the venue closing time.
See, there are some things we are flexible with and some things that MUST be done in a certain order. No meal until after the blessing. First dance before the meal are the main two.
Mike
Mike
I am prudent for relying on my track record of success using a certain method. Simple logic dictates that if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Even logical conclusions are only correct given correct premises. Review your work and come see me before class tomorrow.
My position has all the value it needs to have. The thing you don't get is that the only person it HAS to have value FOR is me!
The position has value because it is borne out of experience with successful events.
It doesn't matter whether or not my position is contrary to an established method that has been used by anyone else with any amount of experience. What matters is that the method being employed has not had any pitfalls to-date, nor led to any downturn at events.
You "scientific-method" approach does not take into account subjective considerations - namely those that have already been suggested.
ie everyone is different and each will have their own methodologies. If 5 different dj's have 5 different methodologies that work for each of them with a proven track record of success, then all methods are equally valid means towards the same ends.
You make the erroneous assumption that the different successful methodologies employed by different professionals to do their jobs should, or CAN work just as well, or to the same proven level of success with anyone who attempts to use it. This is just not so.
All 5 hypothetical methodologies hinted at above, though proven successful with each of their proponents, will no doubt have differing levels of success when adopted and used by the other 5 dj's.
Look man, if times work for you, that's great. YOU do what works FOR YOU. It's plain silliness for you to go on from that to assume that it is or "should" be some sort of industry standard practice.
Nuh uh.
It may be a highly recommended practice. Thats fine. That doesn't overstep any reasonable bounds.
But claiming that "your way" is "the right way" just doesn't fly.
The important thing at any given time isn't how each of us is doing things in our work - its that we are always open and learning from our experiences, and that we are open for modifying them should it become apparent that we would be well advised to do so.
Should my method prove to leave to much to chance down the road, and I have events suffer from it, you will bet I will adopt a different approach. But for me, because I am as logical as you seem to be as well, any changes in methodology are only made for one of two reasons.
1) Experience. ie I screw up or let something happen that could have been avoided. Then I adopt a new practice based on experience.
2) Perceived benefit. ie the method proposed has very clear and perceptible benefits over the method being currently employed.
Criteria number 1 has not come into play as my method has worked consistently for me to this point. Result: no real need to change.
Criteria number 2 has not been met because there are no "pros" for the suggested/alternate method that have been put forth which would make me suspect that the method would be in any way more beneficial than my current one. To the contrary, I myself have experience "cons" with the alternate method that will need to either be re-evaluated, and or outweighed by even more "pros" before the method gets adopted.
As we say here Roxy ol' pal, YMMV.
Its really not that hard to understand that there are as many different SUCCESSFUL methodologies as there are SUCCESSFUL dj's.
You are treating each practice or methodology as if it were ideal objectively and universally, and this just ain't so. Any way of doing things is only going to be as successful as the results it produces by him who is using it.
I understand the first one about blessing, but why the one about 1st dance before meal. Is that a regional tradition? And even if so, how does it go from being a tradition to being an outright requirement or stipulation? Or are you just saying thats the way it plays out most often?
I hope he's being "esoteric" to get us off the "blessing" and/or timeline/sequence portion of the thread. lol
Its all a good read, but I'm still waiting for more wedding planners to get posted!
The first dance is a MUST for us because we want the energy from the introduction to carry over into the first dance.
I was not speaking in general terms, I was talking about musts for me and my fiance.
Mike
I was not speaking in general terms, I was talking about musts for me and my fiance.
Mike
98% of my weddings will do the first dance upon introductions. It works best and most of my clients really want to get it over. When every eye in the place fixed on the couple as they enter, what better time. Beside, tradition as I understand it is no one should dance until the Bride and Groom have danced first. At least now the dance floor is open. And I do get the occasional crowds that will dance before and during dinner. I know I plan to at my daughters wedding.
There is no such tradition.
Not every bride/grrom does a first dance, so that could turn out too be a really long wait.
Yeah, I have heard that tradition here (that the bride and groom open the dancing) and most abide by it down here But it is so ingrained that most people don't even think about it.
Mike
Mike
In this day and age not all traditions are followed. Things are made up as they go along, that's a given. Whether tradition or etiquette, formally the Bride and Groom should be the first to dance. But that's only an option for those brides who wish to deal with formal etiquette. When they don't care then they and their guests will dance when they want.
G
Guest
Guest
It is a strong recommendation from me that the first dance, if any, come after the Grand Entrance. It is my feeling that since we have the energy built up from the introductions and Grand Entrance, why not continue with the flow and then slow things down with the blessing (if any) and toast(s). When put this way it has been my experience that most B&Gs go along. I also suggest that after a point the guests be allowed to join in.
Some also want the F/D and M/S after the first dance. Here I suggest that they hold it till after the meal unless I can invite other fathers and daughters to the dance floor after a time or and other mothers and sons to the dance floor after a time. My logic on this is that most people want to get to the meal and will be getting anxious if they have to sit through three three to four minute dances in a row.
I put the garter toss before the bouquette to encourage more participation from the guys. You see, if the bouquette toss goes first and the lady is, ummm, well, not great looking then the guys may not participate if the tradition of the garter placement is popular in your area.
I also encourage the use of the anniversary dance to replace the garter and bouquet toss. In that we get all the married couples dancing to something slow and then use a process of elimination to find the longest married couple. When we do the B&G give them the garter and bouquette and the wining couple gives the B&G advice on longevity of marriage.
Lastly, I encourage the cake cutting be the last formality just in case the smash happens.
All great suggestions. I know the first dance part to be somewhat of a regional thing - it rarely ever happens before dinner, let alone after introductions, and I have done it that way twice at the couple's request.
Maybe it is something to think about suggesting.
Maybe it is something to think about suggesting.