Weddings What are your red flags during the interview?

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Indeed we all do... but that assessment of "fitness" by many leaves a lot to be desired!



Exactly.



Not qualifications - prices.



LOL.... I'm jealous of no one.
Certainly. The help is never jealous of managers...
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In the end, I'm the help...
Your words. Not mine.

P.S. Worry about your own yang. Mine is self sufficient.
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So Tom, when are going to sell off your DJ equipment? Just think of all the time you'll have to go to church since you won't be on the DJ boards anymore. Maybe you could become a missionary?
 
We are all the help. Anyone who thinks otherwise is kidding themselves at best... and I see no shame or degradation in admitting that.

It's not to under-estimate, under-esteem, or talk-down our contribution to the success of events we do - but however good or bad we are, however artistic or pedantic, however much esteem we hold ourselves in or think we are WORTH holding ourselves in - we are all still just the help.

Its simple really, but you do have to be sufficiently divorced from your ego to come to that simple realization and not have any problems with it. :sqwink:
 
I've gotta say that this thread has me a bit surprised and annoyed. I never realized that such a small thing as whether the J Mac and I are having a blessing before dinner is served at our wedding reception is such a big issue to some DJs.
It's not an issue with 99.9% of the DJ's here as you have read. It's only an issue for Tom. And we all know Tom has issues.

Tom just posts these things so people will talk to him. Without the controversy of such ridicules statements this thread would have ended at page 1. Hey, I respect everyones believes. And since we know everyone has a choice, a choice to hire someone like Tom or not. If he chooses to enforce his personal policies and beliefs on some poor easily influenced bride, I guess we have an answer as to why he quite.

What's he going to do in December with no one to talk to on the board? :sqerr:
 
We are all the help. Anyone who thinks otherwise is kidding themselves at best... and I see no shame or degradation in admitting that.

It's not to under-estimate, under-esteem, or talk-down our contribution to the success of events we do - but however good or bad we are, however artistic or pedantic, however much esteem we hold ourselves in or think we are WORTH holding ourselves in - we are all still just the help.

Its simple really, but you do have to be sufficiently divorced from your ego to come to that simple realization and not have any problems with it. :sqwink:
Another shocker, again we totally disagree.

As previously stated, you are free to characterize what you do as you see fit. To assume you can do the same for performers with whom you have no experience, is just a rant, an igno-rant.
 
Not at all. We are all there to provide a service. To facilitate. To FILL A ROLE. We are part of the hired help for whatever event we work.

It really is that simple.

All you do is tear down and take things to a personal level - nothing is ever contributed or enhanced by your posts - almost as if you're contrary for the sake of being contrary. All you do is make attempts to close off dialog with jabs and insults and little-to-no effort at furthering mutual understanding is ever made.

So in this particular instance, and for the benefit of all present:

What's the nature of your own personal delusion that you think yourself to be something other/more than a service provider hired to facilitate and fill a role within the event itself? What makes you fancy yourself as more than hired help for any event you do?
 
Another red flag is when the groom punches his fiance right in the mouth because he told her to shut up and stop asking so many stupid questions. I hate when that happens. I have to really think hard if I want to do that couples' wedding. Or when they're rolling around on the floor choking each other. It's a little uncomfortable, but hey, at least they're expressing their true feelings instead of keeping it all bottled up, that's not good for you.
 
My concept on the red flags and ending interviews was not a conceited point. Red flags, to me, indicated increasing levels of difficulty that absolutely did not need to be there.

Any sense of micromanagement was leading down the path of a bridezilla. Any sense of lack of care about guests was heading down the path of poor hosting, self centered behavior, and ignorance which many times lead to a bridezilla. Any sense of over control at all, to me, started down the path of bridezilla. This was just my experience and, as I said, your mileage may vary.

To me, bridezillas make for a very stressful event. Weddings are stressful enough without putting up with that.

Now, mind you, I have no control issues with brides. I have had some that have had very restricted playlists; that is, heavy DNPs, and all went very well. I have had brides that have asked for no requests but also gave me artistic control and we had a blast. I've also had brides plan a tight timeline but they had the understanding that things may happen to change it and when it did they didn't jump in my face or even get upset.

What I was looking for was a bride that I could easily work with.

Oh, and another red flag, for me, is the deliberate vagueness or lack of participation when asked questions. For example, if I ask about their music style desire and I get shrugs then that is a red flag.

Animated lack of agreement on a point is another red flag. Obviously they will not agree on everything but if an argument breaks out over it at the interview, walk, no, run away.

Another red flag is lack of participation by either the bride or groom unless there is a legitimate excuse. For example, if the either does not care enough to come to the interview puts out a red flag for me. If they have a tough work schedule or they are in school that is one thing but not being there because they don't want to gets this thing headed down the wrong path, to me.

The advantage I also have is an ability to read people; I'm not blowing my own horn here. I do get a sense from people if they are going to be easy to work with or not and I relied heavily on it. Several prospective clients I turned away with the "oh, sorry, I just got booked" excuse solely based on my gut instinct even though they did not throw red flags other than that at the interview.
 
Wiz: Did you sell you equipment yet Tom?
Tom: Is it November yet?
Wiz: No.
Tom: Didn't I say I wasn't done till November?
Wiz: Yes.
Tom: Then what part of that don't you understand?
 
Something to think about.....most everyone at the reception also went to the ceremony. Which means those of different faiths and non-believers all gathered at the church and Im pretty sure there was a prayer there. So the issue of a blessing is really well...no issue. If the bride and groom say no...hey its their event....but to be honest most have one anyway....cause the minister is usually there.

But it does seem kind of ironic that you push for a blessing and those same people will be getting drunk all night.:sqbiggrin:
 
Wiz: Did you sell you equipment yet Tom?
Tom: Is it November yet?
Ron: One could only hope so!
Wiz: No.
Tom: Didn't I say I wasn't done till November?
Ron: Was anyone really paying attention to what you said?
Wiz: Yes.
Tom: Then what part of that don't you understand?
Ron: The part where you're still typing here.
 
The conversation of religion (blessing..why/why not) between the DJ & the customer is over the line. This is a Red flag for the customer.