Event Pacing - The key to the "Magic" (blog)

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rickryan.com

rickryan.com

Mac Daddy DJ
ODJT Supporter
Dec 9, 2009
20,046
18,426
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Hendersonville, TN
www.rickryan.com
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You said that you know this will piss a lot of DJ's off. It didn't piss me off at all. It was very well thought out and written to me. I agree with the 60 song list and someone that has an Ipod think they can do what we do. That it's not a big deal what we do.
 
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What I saw was you using the first part, dissing what some DJs may be using as their strengths, as an introduction to your own advertisement of your business. That is not how suggestions are given. Unless you are a a Wedding Planner, the DJ's job is to play music and entertain the Guests. Music played for certain parts of the Event is nothing more than Cued sets. What I mean by that, something is choreographed to take place with music as accompaniment the DJ plays it on cue and it goes well. You are wanting to do too much more than the scope of what the typical Wedding DJ should be doing. By pointing out to others that you are not going to do, or do not do, what some others are actually doing, only highlights your deficiencies in that area. If you will take note that there are more successul Weddings happening all the time in a format totally different to what you are doing, then you will understand that you can't try and make all Weddings like yours.

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You are also trying to do other peoples work and thus cut them out of the equation so you can claim credit for everything. I see that in many parts of your postings both DJ and non DJ related. Remember live and let live. Find out from the Client what YOU have to do and then just do it, that is your assigned job/task.
 
Is your blog intended to talk to other DJs? If not, then I would consider taking out the references to what any other DJ thinks.

The other thing to think about is whether the plan you are selling is fully realistic and compatible with how a bride anticipates her wedding being handled or directed, or who is ultimately the vendor (if any) she considers to be at the top of the food chain. If she has hired a planner - then whatever responsibility the planner has been charged with would reflect the bride's intention.

So it is with the "list." Does it really seem logical that someone paying for music service should leave the choices entirely to the DJ? Is it wise for a DJ to turn away the couples autobiography of favorite songs and do not plays? When it comes to reading the crowd isn't every puzzle made easier by having a few of the pieces already in place?

Instead of telling people what to do or not to do - I think they would be more receptive if you were able to accept what you know they prefer to do, and then tell them how to make it work well for you.

As Canute points out - what brides really seek is team player not a director.
 
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ahoustondj said:
Unless you are a a Wedding Planner, the DJ's job is to play music and entertain the Guests. You are wanting to do too much more than the scope of what the typical Wedding DJ should be doing. - - - Updated - - -

You are also trying to do other peoples work and thus cut them out of the equation so you can claim credit for everything. job/task.
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Houston, it is clear from your post you don't do many weddings and lack a clear understanding of the responsibilities that a "typical" wedding DJ has. A HUGE part of keeping guests entertained is tempo and flow. Included in the "scope" of a wedding DJ's responsibility is making sure the other vendors are aware of what's going on, that the parents are ready (as in not in the bathroom or at the bar) and that the venue has the silverware and plates in place when it's time to cut the cake (you'd be surprised)

When I talk with clients and they tell me their planner/venue person suggested putting all the dances together to "get them out of the way" I remind them of the significance of the parent dances, I remind them that when you lump everything together these moments become drawn out instead of magical. Forward momentum sets the tone for what's to come. A Bride may have a DOC (day of coordinator) or a wedding planner but NONE of it happens without the DJ which is why he/she must be aware and involved with all aspects of the reception. Putting your head in the sand and expecting others to take care of it is a great way to derail a reception. As always communication is the key.
 
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mikemerlin said:
Houston, it is clear from your post you don't do many weddings and lack a clear understanding of the responsibilities that a "typical" wedding DJ has. A HUGE part of keeping guests entertained is tempo and flow. Included in the "scope" of a wedding DJ's responsibility is making sure the other vendors are aware of what's going on, that the parents are ready (as in not in the bathroom or at the bar) and that the venue has the silverware and plates in place when it's time to cut the cake (you'd be surprised)

When I talk with clients and they tell me their planner/venue person suggested putting all the dances together to "get them out of the way" I remind them of the significance of the parent dances, I remind them that when you lump everything together these moments become drawn out instead of magical. Forward momentum sets the tone for what's to come. A Bride may have a DOC (day of coordinator) or a wedding planner but NONE of it happens without the DJ which is why he/she must be aware and involved with all aspects of the reception. Putting your head in the sand and expecting others to take care of it is a great way to derail a reception. As always communication is the key.
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Don't give me that crap that I don't do a lot of Weddings! I have done a lot of Weddings in my time and still do but certainly not as much. I prefer to stay away from them because they are not as enjoyable as my other events. I am in tune however as to what needs to be done and I also can tell the ones who are confident in what they are doing and execute it well vs the ones who are running around like a chicken with their head cut off trying to gather everyone else.

BTW it is not my job to see that the "Venue has the silverware and plates in place when it's time to cut the cake", what in the Hell does that have to do with playing music? They are supposed to cue you when everything is ready to go. You don't see the Photographer running around doing those sort of things! Y'all are trying to be "heroes", "save the day" assistants etc. If everyone who is charged with a task does their job in a professional manner then everything should go off without a hitch. The only difference between a Wedding and a Corporate Party, Anniversary, Reunion etc is that there may be more people involved in making the pieces come together.

BTW do you also make sure that all the centerpieces are correctly centered on the tables? If you all want to run around like busboys and wait staff then do so but don't make clients feel it is to be expected by all other DJs!
 
ATTENTION LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! It is time to cut the cake :) Let's give a round of applause for our Bride and Groom, you guys ready?....Oh wait...you're not? you don't have silverware or a plate...HOW AWKWARD...Hey everyone, it's not my job to check these things

#houstonwehaveaproblem

If you rely on others and they don't do their job the DJ is the one who looks bad so "roll the dice and take yer chances" Houston!
 
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Wait wait I got another one! ....ATTENTION LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...it is now time for the Father/Daughter dance...this is a dance that has taken a lifetime to happen...Please welcome to the floor Jennifer and her Dad Adam...for their dance they've chosen to dance to Bob Carlisle's....Butterfly Kisses (crowd goes awwww)....but wait, Houston we have a problem! Jennifer's Dad is taking a piss in the bathroom despite the planner saying he was ready....and guess who looks like an unprofessional ASS? Bingo it's the DJ. Do I need to provide more examples or are you convinced yet?
 
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mikemerlin said:
Wait wait I got another one! ....ATTENTION LADIES AND GENTLEMEN...it is now time for the Father/Daughter dance...this is a dance that has taken a lifetime to happen...Please welcome to the floor Jennifer and her Dad Adam...for their dance they've chosen to dance to Bob Carlisle's....Butterfly Kisses (crowd goes awwww)....but wait, Houston we have a problem! Jennifer's Dad is taking a piss in the bathroom despite the planner saying he was ready....and guess who looks like an unprofessional ASS? Bingo it's the DJ. Do I need to provide more examples or are you convinced yet?
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They don't do these kinds of gigs. They obviously don't understand the concept beyond (to use canute's phrase) "order taking". These brides elicit and need help and direction. Planners, 90% never have their pulse on what's going on and can (at best) "direct" from the sidelines. These brides hire me because of the confidence and "I have your back" attitude that I display to them and part of that is in education. Canute, you asked how I've gone from $500 to $3k. This is it. I provide more and more of the pie and each piece I add puts cash in my pocket and bigger smiles on their faces.

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ahoustondj said:
Don't give me that crap that I don't do a lot of Weddings! I have done a lot of Weddings in my time and still do but certainly not as much. I prefer to stay away from them because they are not as enjoyable as my other events.
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Canute, I'm sure you've done many a wedding but let me be straight (no offense), you do not have the personal presentation, communication ability or speech ability to relate to the typical American bride. Don't get me wrong, I highly, highly respect what you do. You bring in big sound, you do your homework on assignments and I have no doubt that you handle large-scale, corporate events or club work with ease. That does not make you suitable to this particular clientele and your speech today demonstrates that I'm correct. Now in your world (corp), I struggle and reach as well, but at least I'm man enough to admit it and try to learn. You only demonstrate stubbornness and a condescending attitude towards us wedding DJs and it's simply something that you cannot take command of. When in a hole...........stop digging.

All the best to you, my friend.

And as for Bob, you did make one good point on my blog. I missed writing out the "We normally request 10-15 songs from the client to give us direction on how to steer the evening". I used the blog to demonstrate a take-charge confidence and that sells dates. If I wanted to sell $500 beg-for-them dates, I'd use the "whatever you desire mistress" approach. However, in my experience those are the clientele that will abuse you the most and pay you the least while doing it. No thanks. I'll stay on my course. It's working.

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My attempt at a re-write (man, these bronchial meds are kicking my tail tonight), using Bob's "advice".

[h=2]The DJ-by-Proxy Bride[/h]Another thing that often can trip up a successful evening falls squarely at the feet of Mr. Steve Jobs and a little device called an iPod. Let’s face it, we’ve all got a million songs and it makes everyone think they’re a DJ who can easily write out a slamming mix that will have the house jumping. I have to admit that I cringe anytime I get that dreaded 60-song playlist (yes, we’ll do it, if that’s what you want) where the client has picked out every single song, and in the order they want them played. Big, BIG mistake. The smartest advice I can give is to give your DJ about 10-15 of your personal favorites. A good DJ can take that list and can tell within a few seconds where you are (musically-speaking) and will know how to angle the evening to make it work for you. Let the professional you’ve hired do what you’ve paid them to do. They have a method and a plan, you just enjoy the evening because I assure you it will go by quickly.
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mikemerlin said:
ATTENTION LADIES AND GENTLEMEN! It is time to cut the cake :) Let's give a round of applause for our Bride and Groom, you guys ready?....Oh wait...you're not? you don't have silverware or a plate...HOW AWKWARD...Hey everyone, it's not my job to check these things

#houstonwehaveaproblem

If you rely on others and they don't do their job the DJ is the one who looks bad so "roll the dice and take yer chances" Houston!
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That is such a ludicrous scenario. I have always asked that they have everything ready then give me a signal cue me. That has worked each and everytime without me having to leave my post running around like houseboy? Do you ever see band members having to do that kind of crap? When the time is ready, the band gets a cue and they start! You guys call yourselves professionals?????

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rickryan.com said:
Canute, I'm sure you've done many a wedding but let me be straight (no offense), you do not have the personal presentation, communication ability or speech ability to relate to the typical American bride.
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Who gave you authority to determine what I can or cannot do? Have YOU ever see me do a Live Wedding or any Event for that matter? Who do you think my Clients are, your tire kicking Brides to be or the ones that you have to fear will give you bad reviews? I don't have to fear bad reviews because I have the confidence to execute any event well and satisfy my clients.
 
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Houston, pray tell how you get them to give you a signal if you haven't communicated with them earlier? Or are you relying on the planner to be master of ceremonies? I, like Rick, have a great deal of respect for you but your replies only expose your ignorance when it comes to handling weddings

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^^^^ya know, no offense of course
 
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rickryan.com said:
You only demonstrate stubbornness and a condescending attitude towards us wedding DJs and it's simply something that you cannot take command of.
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You make me laugh when I read this....trying to gather sympathy for your cause, eh! If you are anyone else find what I say to be condescending, maybe it is because you are not used to others challenging your ideas. The same way you go bonkers when you get a less than perfect review. The pattern here seems to say the same to me!! All you want is approval. Well I am here to tell you, the ones here who will always tell you what a good job you have done or how great things look may secretly be laughing at you and or afraid to tell you like it is. I would much prefer an enemy tell me that danger lies ahead rather than a friend say the path is all safe to travel.
 
Houston, you remind me of the chicken whose head has been cut off but doesn't realize it yet. You've got two dj's who do weddings on a regular basis telling you that you are dead nuts wrong yet you continue to run around the yard...you've contradicted yourself numerous times (see above) and admitted you don't do a lot of weddings. If you did you would not be defending your position so idealistically/on paper this is how it should be. Just fall over already and get on the plate! Lol
 
mikemerlin said:
Houston, pray tell how you get them to give you a signal if you haven't communicated with them earlier? Or are you relying on the planner to be master of ceremonies? I, like Rick, have a great deal of respect for you but your replies only expose your ignorance when it comes to handling weddings

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^^^^ya know, no offense of course
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Of course I had to have communicated with them earlier, duh. I have a copy of the Agenda and the timeline/sequence of things as they are to occur. The Music is the accompaniment to the act not the reverse, therefore I see no need to go and chase down anyone. When all is ready I get a heads up and I make the announcement and play the accompanying music!

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mikemerlin said:
Houston, you remind me of the chicken whose head has been cut off but doesn't realize it yet. You've got two dj's who do weddings on a regular basis telling you that you are dead nuts wrong yet you continue to run around the yard...you've contradicted yourself numerous times (see above) and admitted you don't do a lot of weddings. If you did you would not be defending your position so idealistically/on paper this is how it should be. Just fall over already and get on the plate! Lol
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Two DJs out of how many there are? Are you operating in my arena? I am not the one who is getting bad reviews or less than perfect reviews! I am not the one who is always on here complaining about reviews, y'all are!
 
ahoustondj said:
Of course I had to have communicated with them earlier, duh. I have a copy of the Agenda and the timeline/sequence of things as they are to occur. The Music is the accompaniment to the act not the reverse, therefore I see no need to go and chase down anyone. When all is ready I get a heads up and I make the announcement and play the accompanying music!
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LOL. You are embarrassing yourself Houston. What happens when you don't get a heads up? When there is no wedding planner? When the coordinator of the venue is downstairs doing another wedding? This response further illustrates your lack of real world experience doing weddings. To be honest though I do love these back and forths. It's humorous to have someone who does not do weddings regularly tell the guys who do how it is! :)
 
mikemerlin said:
LOL. You are embarrassing yourself Houston. What happens when you don't get a heads up? When there is no wedding planner? When the coordinator of the venue is downstairs doing another wedding? This response further illustrates your lack of real world experience doing weddings. To be honest though I do love these back and forths. It's humorous to have someone who does not do weddings regularly tell the guys who do how it is! :)
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Embarrassing myself! How? Maybe where you are those kind of professionals are prone to not being where they are supposed to be at the required times. I have not experienced those problems. I have also done many Weddings with no Planner and had the Client designate someone who would coordinate what I wanted so when the time came everyone would be in their place. All one has to do is ask. I guess you guys prefer to be like errand boys running around a room or venue looking for people so you all can build up brownie points. To sum it up, you guys take on the task of Wedding Planner or run around boy and I don't. I like to work smart not hard!

When I first started doing Weddings maybe you were not even sperm as yet. ;)
 
ahoustondj said:
Embarrassing myself! How?
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It's simple, because you're clueless and you yet you keep spewing. Canute, I really do like you but brother, you need to learn when accept that someone else is right and you're wrong.....and to admit it publicly. I have a perception of the events you probably do and yes, I'm sure you've done your share of weddings. That said, what we're describing is accurate and right-on. The events we're doing (wedding jocks) are often events in the 100-250 person range and half the time there won't even be someone (planner/coordinator) to take orders from. Of the cases we actually do have someone there, that person is out of the loop and clueless 70% of the time and often their biggest concern is how to talk the Bride into just cutting cake and doing all the first dances up front so she can go home early. It's a completely different animal to deal with. No better, no worse than anything you do, just different and requires to be addressed differently and from a different approach.
 
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