Weddings A few questions about Wedding Coordinators.

[Papa Deuce]

I have yet to have one at a wedding I am DJing, but one of my clients said she may use one for her 2011 wedding.

So, if she hires one, does that mean I have to do what the WC wants to do, when she wants to do it? Is it my job to contact the WC to get details about what is supposed to happen, or should the WC be calling me in advance?

I know we see lots of threads slamming these folks, but assuming they are, and act like professionals, what is the proper protocol?

 

[DJ J Mac]

In my mind a true professional one should make sure that all vendors are on the same page, but at the same time make sure that the page is the one the Bride and Groom want.

They shouldn't tell you how to do your job or keep you out of contact with the B&G.

 

[Fred Wright]

Ask the bride to let you know when she books a coordinator. Or ask her to ensure the WC gets in contact with you. The WC may be responsible for working up an itinerary. The sooner you have contact, the better.

Often it's more about what the B&G want. The WC's responsibility is to ensure that things go smoothly in the time allotted. The professionals don't micromanage nor try to dictate.

Proper protocol is to work with the WC. Notice I didn't say work for. Work with. The WC has a job to do, same as the rest.

 

[nextgen1]

I find they do more for the ceremony than they do for the reception other than to make sure that all folks are on the same page. I'm always polite to them a provide them with the flow of events of the night that I discuss with the bride a head of time :triwink:.

I find that most brides just want a smooth event and sometimes that is just a person they know of who does that sort of detail work. I find that if I'm on my game most of them just sit and eat and enjoy the night. I try and keep them up on all things going on just to make them feel useful. Remember if you make there job fun and easy you have just become there number one DJ and gain one more referral to push for your services.

Here is a review (From Wedding Wire) that was from a wedding we did 2 weeks ago the wedding was huge 350 people and a total of 3 sounds systems and our LCD screen: "I LOVE LOVE LOVE TNG DJ! They are awesome! No other dj would go out of the way to make your wedding flow more smoothly! Dave bends over backwards to help with everything, including video montage that my friend made! His voice overs he provides on the father/ daughter dance was excellent. I can say after the dance there wasn't a dry eye in the house. My now husband loved the dj as well. He makes sure he plays what you want when you want! I would DEFIANTLY recommend TNG Digital DJ for your wedding or any other party"

 

[Papa Deuce]

I find they do more for the ceremony than they do for the reception other than to make sure that all folks are on the same page. I'm always polite to them a provide them with the flow of events of the night that I discuss with the bride a head of time :triwink:.

I find that most brides just want a smooth event and sometimes that is just a person they know of who does that sort of detail work. I find that if I'm on my game most of them just sit and eat and enjoy the night. I try and keep them up on all things going on just to make them feel useful. Remember if you make there job fun and easy you have just become there number one DJ and gain one more referral to push for your services.

Here is a review (From Wedding Wire) that was from a wedding we did 2 weeks ago the wedding was huge 350 people and a total of 3 sounds systems and our LCD screen: "I LOVE LOVE LOVE TNG DJ! They are awesome! No other dj would go out of the way to make your wedding flow more smoothly! Dave bends over backwards to help with everything, including video montage that my friend made! His voice overs he provides on the father/ daughter dance was excellent. I can say after the dance there wasn't a dry eye in the house. My now husband loved the dj as well. He makes sure he plays what you want when you want! I would DEFIANTLY recommend TNG Digital DJ for your wedding or any other party"

See, that was my point.... I thought that THEY were supposed to keep US up on the events... I mean they are the coordinators.

 

[bill_smith]

Greetings Papa Deuce,

Best thing is to attack the issue straightforwardly with your client since you know in advance that someone is going to pick that up. Ask what is the level of interaction she feels that this person needs with you(given your level of services)and go from there.

Ask to meet with both the bride and WC in advance, you can assess levels of professionalism then, and assess how much you will need to carry. Often, they are friends of the family, not professionals, and will be glad to take advice from an experienced hand, others are professional with their own companies, and actually can be quiet good.(rare, but it happens

Solve the problem in advance before it becomes a problem.

I've been surprised often with a wedding coordinator showing up and introducing themselves without any advance warning.

They are very useful for ceremonies and I think often get hired because the bride in question gets panicked and overwhelmed and wants someone else to deal with a lot of detail. I have learned not to feel offended because of this development, because I, like many of us here, do really good detailed work for weddings. But we don't handle everything, like lighting table candles, straigtening lapels, pinning flowers or bustling trains etc

In those situations where I've been surprised, I've reacted by shaking their hands, and thanking them for being a part of the brides day and show them the itinerary that has previously been prepared by the bride and me, and indicate that "this is what "WE" have planned out" , and see if the coordinator has any instructions from the bride to change things. Verify that quietly if possible, but in your case, if you include her in on the planning sessions, then there will be no surprises and should run smoothly. .

Then I ask them if they'd mind helping me out by corraling and lining up the wedding party for introductions, and were thrilled, and occasionally they will come over to "let me know" what the next thing is....and I ask them to make sure that for example, if the toasts are ready to be made, to ask them to locate the toasters so that I can announce them.

It makes sense to simply back off, and make them "buy In' that you need help, and give them tasks that you might otherwise do unaided.

in one case, The wedding coordinator wanted to be held responsible for everything. So...when the times came due on our duelly planned planner, I would go over to her table where she was sitting with her husband, eating, and inform her that it was time to get the bride and groom for her cake cutting , 5 people for toasts, and bouquet and garter....and she would have to get up and go get them. She never got to finish that meal. Oh well, that's what she asked for. I did exactly as she wanted.

She ended the night by remarking how difficult my job was, and marvelled at how I was able to hold it together at events where I didnt have someone to help.

Frankly, they can be a great help if you can get them to think you really need help.

Rather than butt heads, roll with it unless you feel that they are ruining things

I have this problem less and less now that my wife is hired with me when we do ceremony and receptions.

I hope this helped.

I have yet to have one at a wedding I am DJing, but one of my clients said she may use one for her 2011 wedding.

So, if she hires one, does that mean I have to do what the WC wants to do, when she wants to do it? Is it my job to contact the WC to get details about what is supposed to happen, or should the WC be calling me in advance?

I know we see lots of threads slamming these folks, but assuming they are, and act like professionals, what is the proper protocol?

 

[nextgen1]

See, that was my point.... I thought that THEY were supposed to keep US up on the events... I mean they are the coordinators.

Papa I think they are more useful for events that are not run by knowledgeable and some what aggressive DJ. I personaly think they are becoming less of an issue when a bride sees that her MC has no problem directing an event. It is one of the reasons I add testimonials to our website. So that our brides see that I'm capable or running there event. Plus they save money by not hiring one. Most of the time I think they are there not as a director but more just to assure that details are carried out. I like being the one they don't worry about.

 

[Sounds To Go]

Everyone has pretty much given the gist of it. I've been fortunate enough to work with planners who have fully expected me to work with the client to finalize the reception structure and specifics, which is the way I like it

So essentially, they do their whole wedding day timeline thing, through the ceremony, and then they throw out the time for dinner because the kitchen staff is held to that - everything else, ie how we fill in the blanks during the reception is up to me to determine with the client.

Just my opinion that unless they also have experience dj'ing or MC'ing, they shouldn't be determining flow and whatnot for special events, dancing, etc.

What I always try to do is keep the communication open, and I will make sure that at the least, my timeline has the same times as theirs for start, BG arrival, dinner, toasts, finish time, etc.

They're just spit balling it, and things never happen on the dot anyway, so I'm not too worried about throwing them the bone of letting them know I "get it" with regards to what they have down.

The biggest thing is communication - specially before the event. Contact the planner directly by phone earlier rather than later, introduce yourself, and just let her know that you'll be working with the client to come up with the flow of special events for the reception, and that you will then send her that timeline, and that "of course" you're able to sync up your timeline with whatever she has worked up so you're on the same page.

Shouldn't be any major issues.

 

[Papa Deuce]

Papa I think they are more useful for events that are not run by knowledgeable and some what aggressive DJ. I personaly think they are becoming less of an issue when a bride sees that her MC has no problem directing an event. It is one of the reasons I add testimonials to our website. So that our brides see that I'm capable or running there event. Plus they save money by not hiring one. Most of the time I think they are there not as a director but more just to assure that details are carried out. I like being the one they don't worry about.

Well, no... not from what I have heard. The way it is explained to me is that you hire one to save money, as these folks can get you better pricing on many items. I have a cousin who is a sales / catering manager, and she told me that she gives "some" coordinators a discount. ( 5% )

And I have heard that they can arrange other small discounts.... but when all added up, can be a nice chunk of change.

But Dave, as I said before, I think you have the DJ "gift".... and if I were getting married, and you were in my area, you would be my DJ.

 

[Steve Cie]

In today's soft economy, many are starting small service businesses to augment their income. You need to be weary of this fact, especially with so-called Wedding Coordinators.

If you contract with a bride to do her wedding, and she also contracts a "Wedding Coordinator", the very first thing you should do is check the "Wedding Coordinator's" credentials. Does the WC have any experience? Has the experience been successful? Has the WC worked with any DJ you know?

Once these questions have been answered, you can then make an informed decision on how you are going to proceed.

If the WC is a novice, that does not necessarily mean that a train wreck is forthcoming. But...you should communicate with the novice WC and establish a dialogue of mutual respect and goals. You can most likely help the WC in carrying out a successful reception for the bride.

If the WC is a seasoned professional with a proven track record, shut thy mouth and follow the lead of the WC. By establishing a congenial cooperative working re-pore, you stand to gain more future work from the WC directly.


Remember...a professional works with the other professionals in achieving the goal of satisfying the client.

Check your ego in at the door. You will all be happier for it!

 

[nextgen1]

Well, no... not from what I have heard. The way it is explained to me is that you hire one to save money, as these folks can get you better pricing on many items. I have a cousin who is a sales / catering manager, and she told me that she gives "some" coordinators a discount. ( 5% )

And I have heard that they can arrange other small discounts.... but when all added up, can be a nice chunk of change.

But Dave, as I said before, I think you have the DJ "gift".... and if I were getting married, and you were in my area, you would be my DJ.

Ah shucks

 

[Sounds To Go]

Great points Steve - I am fortunate to have gotten on the good side of a few local coordinators early on in my business and I have gotten business from them as a result of it.

Some of what I might have lacked in on-the-job situation experience when I worked with them first time was obviously made up for by a willingness to learn and an ability to adapt and be a team player.

Definitely no need (or room) to introduce egos - only room for a shared common goal - ie a successful event.

 

[groovielou]

IMO, coordinators can be your best buddy or worst nightmare. Most of them are control freaks and micro mangers. Unfortunately, many DJ's are the same. So, it doesn't take a genus to see the possible issues.

Once again Fred is "Wright"!

Generally, once I know a Coordinator is involved, I will meet with the Bride, anyone she wishes to invite, and the Coordinator and nail down everyones specific roles. I have no problem giving up complete control of the event flow to the Coordinator if thats what my bride wants. It just makes my job easier. Either way, I get paid the same. All I want is a happy bride!

 

[Ausumm]

the few WC's I have worked with were more than glad to let me do my thing.
for them, it's one less thing to worry about, anyway.
Just talk to the B/G and ask THEM how you should handle it.
(of course, AFTER you tell them it's better to work with you directly)

The ones I have dealt with were not hired to save the couple money.
they were there to make the "details" of wedding planning easier.

 

[bill_smith]

Ok, I think we actually have two definitions here. Papa thanx for this clarification.

A wedding planner(think J'lo's film a few years ago) is someone who the bride hires to over see the whole tamale, soup to nuts, and arranges vendors writes the checks and hires them in concert with the bride and assists the bride with overseeign the entire thing, including the budget.

A wedding coordinator is someone who shows up on the day of and works with the vendors, and for the bride, and may be that friend of the family, or a wedding planner whio also does the coordination herself(seen that too).

In your case, it is unkown as to which flavor you will get.

either way, I think my advice still stands as offered and that is to attack it beforehand, by letting your bride know that you will be delighted to work with whomever she hires, and ofer to meet up so that everyone is on the same page.

Well, no... not from what I have heard. The way it is explained to me is that you hire one to save money, as these folks can get you better pricing on many items. I have a cousin who is a sales / catering manager, and she told me that she gives "some" coordinators a discount. ( 5% )

And I have heard that they can arrange other small discounts.... but when all added up, can be a nice chunk of change.

But Dave, as I said before, I think you have the DJ "gift".... and if I were getting married, and you were in my area, you would be my DJ.

 

[Papa Deuce]

See, Bill, and again, this was just my understanding, but the planner is also the coordinator. Maybe I am just wrong.

 

[bill_smith]

It's not a matter of being right or wrong, it's understanding what flavor is going to get tossed your way papa.

And sometimes it can be "none of the above".

This year, I've dealt with 4.

1 was an event planner. She set the timeline, and pretty much I was blocked off from the bride.

2 were friends of the family and were deeply releived that I actually had a timeline and knew what I was doing.

the 4th was the one mentioned above.

The first one actually assisted the bride in hiring vendors and giving her choices, like you describe.

I THINK that since you are already hired, you most likely have a day of person to deal with, otherwise you might actually be dealing with a wedding planner asking how much you charge.

Irrespective of that delineation, I feel that for you, getting ahead of the curve so that whomever shows up is on the same page as you when you start this thing is of paramount importance to having a smooth event and smooth landing.

 

[DJ Freddy]

I email my wedding coordinator a copy of all the forms that the bride has filled out so we can all take into account how she wants her event detailed. I really like it when I have one at my event since they usually help me out be y organizing the couples for the intro and in other areas too. When all the vendors get along at an event usually the event goes smoother.

 

[Ausumm]

either way, I think my advice still stands as offered and that is to attack it beforehand, by letting your bride know that you will be delighted to work with whomever she hires, and ofer to meet up so that everyone is on the same page.

be pro-active!
it will not only answer your question, Chuck...
it'll give you the opportunity to take charge of your part of the event, before you LOSE the opportunity!

 

[Papa Deuce]

be pro-active!
it will not only answer your question, Chuck...
it'll give you the opportunity to take charge of your part of the event, before you LOSE the opportunity!

Well, I can't do ANYTHING yet, as she hasn't actually hired one yet., not even me.... though I am waiting for the signed contract. The bride said she "may" hire a WC for her wedding.

But if I get notified that she is having one, if I get a contract back, I will be proactive.

I should not have called her a client, yet. My fault.