Weddings Need opinions please

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trafficgoo

trafficgoo

Weight lifting Music Guy
Apr 1, 2008
4,435
40
Gilbert, AZ
www.musclemanmusic.com
Hey everybody...haven't been on in awhile because of my schedule but I need some opinions.

My wife and I did a wedding reception last night at a venue that we've never done before. It was a simple 5:30p - 10p event, so we thought, but turned out to be insane. The venue ended up being an ala cart type place...you rent the room and bring in everything else...all your own vendors.

At the time of booking with the bride and groom, nothing was said of this. In other words, it would've been complete and utter chaos if my wife wouldn't have stepped in as event planner last night and ran everything including the cutting of the cake, assisting in dinner service etc....basically doing everything on the otherside of us DJing the event. On top of that, we started an extra half hour early since guests arrived earlier then expected.

Our services include basic wedding coordinating from my wife from the time that we're scheduled to play. What she did last night was being a full blown wedding planner to make the sure the b&g's night went well. For this we would charge an extra fee...they basically ran her into the ground last night and it seemed like they knew exactly what they were doing, as if they planned it this way.

The reasons why I'm thinking this? The groom, earlier in the night mentioned how the venue was trying to nickel and dime them for every little thing and he mentioned that he was glad that we were there. And I tried to say goodnight to the groom twice, standing right next to him as he was talking to guests. He kept making eye contact with me in a nervous fashion knowing I was there, then basically walked away from me in a hurry to go speak with other people. Then he and the bride made the fastest exit ever without even thanking us. We found out that they even stiffed the bartender for some monies due.

So here's my question. Is there a way to legally bill them for the extra work? My wife went way beyond what we charged for. She stepped in so their day would be a good one, which it was. We just feel slighted for what happened...even though we don't expect tips, someone should have given one last night for services rendered above and beyond the contract fees.

Your thoughts?
 
Do you have a written or verbal agreement for services rendered? If it was verbal, was compensation discussed, was there a witness? If the answer is "no" then next time either get it in writing or don't be suckered in by another's emergency. Without a written or verbal agreement you have no legal standing for compensation.
 
I'd just chalk it up to experience and let it go; since you and your wife "willingly" jumped in to perform these duties outside of your original agreement. Consider it your Wedding/Christmas to the couple and leave it at that. YMMV
 
Like Kirby said, just let it go. I have learned some B&G's will push the limits as to see how much they can get out of you that is not in the contract. I have had to learn to just say no, or at least let them know that was not part of the signed contract, but if they are wiling to pay the extra fees (now) we can do what they are asking.
 
I agree

I have to agree with the others--it's just one of those things that happens once in a 'Blue Moon' just chalk it up experience. Let it go.
I always check with every Vendor before most if not every event I do--especially the Wedding and Reception Venue...to find out how they do things and what changes might be needed.
 
CAPTJACKJFB said:
I always check with every Vendor before most if not every event I do--especially the Wedding and Reception Venue...to find out how they do things and what changes might be needed.
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Isn't that going a bit too far? Are THEY taking the time to check with YOU? Has it ever crossed your mind that you are making yourself look insignificant in their eyes? Last of all, if everyone did exactly what they were hired to do, don't you think that everything would go smoothly?
 
ahoustondj said:
Isn't that going a bit too far? Are they taking the time to check with YOU? Has it ever crossed your mind that you are making yourself look insignificant in their eyes? Last of all, if everyone did exactly what they were hired to do, don't you think that everything would go smoothly?
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Actually Houston, we do this too....and other vendors love it. It shows we are dedicated to making sure things run smoothly for the client.
 
sightsandsounds said:
Actually Houston, we do this too....and other vendors love it. It shows we are dedicated to making sure things run smoothly for the client.
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Once I do my site visit with the Venue, thats it for me. This is the way I roll. Will I help out with an issue at the event? Absolutely! However I am not hired to go around coordinating other stuff with other vendors. That is a job for the coordinator or Event Planner.
 
I guess it all depends on the type of venues you work in too...we do many VFW/American Legion/Eagles club weddings, where there is no wedding planner. Contacting the photographer and caterer ahead of time helps everyone be on the same page as far as timelines and who will be doing what goes. If we are told there is a coordinator, we will still contact all the vendors prior to the event, but just to introduce ourselves.
 
I usually do not contact the other vendors ahead of time. I leave it up to the client to include the other vendors.
 
Okay, here is what I have learned in my 23 years of Djing--This is the Bride's day. I want everything to go wonderfully well. I will move 'heaven and earth' to make sure there are no last minute "surprises' When I call or walk into a venue a few days before the $70,000 wedding...in a suit. They feel they are meeting with a Professional Mobile Entertainer /DJ-- not a guy who just 'spins tunes'...I review the Wedding Guide Sheet I have used for years (and have gone over with the Bride and Groom 3 Times throught the 7 or 8 months since we booked) and make sure we are all on the same page--I also call the photographer if I can... and sometimes even bring him or her a hot cup of Starbucks when i arrive..

NOW here is the point: The day of the Wedding The Staff are told to treat the DJ with utmost respect. The Photographer is up to date on how things will flow and the Bride and groom are in Romance Heaven dancing to a bevey of great music. That's just how I roll! Does it work? See my website.
 
I would think that most of these issues would have come up in a final phone call.
I always talk the the b/g a day or two before the event.

If none of these issues came up in a normal conversation with the client...
that's pretty nuts.

I don't think they planned it to screw you guys...
but I do think they took advantage of your willingness to help.
in which case, consider it a gift.
 
p.s.

nice to see ya back, Goo
hope CC is treating you well
(if you're still there)
 
Kirby Ball said:
I'd just chalk it up to experience and let it go; since you and your wife "willingly" jumped in to perform these duties outside of your original agreement. Consider it your Wedding/Christmas to the couple and leave it at that. YMMV
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Exactly. Don't do something nice for someone with expectations.
 
Thanks Mike. Still at CC...surviving...hope you're doing the same.

And thanks everybody for your input. We didn't think we could do anything about this situation but figured I'd ask. Our goal is to make every bride and groom's wedding a special. We did just that once again. This is actually going to make us tweak our contract slightly to put things in more detail.

I'm going to at least try and get a Wedding Wire review out of these two.
 
Sounds like your wife voluntary assisted in all the extra work, without any discussion of additional fees.

With that said, I always ask about other vendors, especially the photographer, many times I've worked with them previously, if not I ask a lot of questions so I know if they are able to for instance pose the B&G for the cake cutting, make sure the knife is there for them to cut the cake, among other things. I'm such a stickler for details it's sometimes ridiculous. I always make sure the wine is poured for the toast which in our region immediately follows the wedding party introduction and blessing, for which mics are placed in advance with instruction to the individuals who will be using them. So many details, but if they are not taken care of it is the DJ who ultimately looks bad.
 
ahoustondj said:
Once I do my site visit with the Venue, thats it for me. This is the way I roll. Will I help out with an issue at the event? Absolutely! However I am not hired to go around coordinating other stuff with other vendors. That is a job for the coordinator or Event Planner.
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Really? We require our DJs to make sure everyone who is involved with any particular event (cake cutting, father/daughter, etc) is in the room and ready to go BEFORE making any announcement(s). Part of m.c. duties is to make sure things run on time. Also, like others have said here, many venues and/or clients do not have a professional planner/coordinator to make sure things run smoothly. It really only takes a minute or so to just make sure everyone is ready to go.
 
trafficgoo said:
I'm going to at least try and get a Wedding Wire review out of these two.
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I wouldn't if I were you. These are not honorable people. I give you 50/50 odds that, even with all the freebie extra you did for them, they'll ding you on a review. Were I you, I would not put my biz reputation on the line with that lack of character (on their part).

As for the money, forget it. If you pressed it, you might get something out of them but I doubt a judge would side with you (no contract in regards). Besides, if you press legal action you're allowing them a much longer stay in your world than they deserve. Some people are just scum. Let it go and move on to something better.

Good luck with it.
 
blacktiedjs said:
Really? We require our DJs to make sure everyone who is involved with any particular event (cake cutting, father/daughter, etc) is in the room and ready to go BEFORE making any announcement(s).
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No Kidding! I think that goes without saying! :trirolleyes: In other words a "No Brainer"! :triwink:
 
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