Sometime's you'd be surprised how these kinds of judgments and ultimatums can work to your advantage *IF* you are VERY careful as to how they are crafted and how they addressed the initial inquiry.
I posted a thread here awhile ago where in her second email inquiry (no phone yet at the time), the bride asked me if I used CD's or MP3's. I told her I used CD's, and her next reply was "Well by fiance wants to use someone who is using a laptop instead of cd's, shows you what I know when shopping for this stuff, but thank you for your time, you've been very helpful!"
The original email quote was in my other thread, but those were the elements of her response, that short and sweet, and in that order.
Essentially a dismissal based on my answer right? They're moving on shopping other guys and I am supposed to "get the clue" at that point right?
Heck no! I emailed her back explaining to her that the choice of medium *shouldn't* be a determining factor in the entertainment she chooses as it shouldn't make a tangible difference in the service they receive if they are using truly professional services.
They set up a consult, and it went well, but I didn't hear from them for months. Then, I get y contract back in the mail, and the wedding went GREAT!
So don't be afraid to take on stating policy/educating the customer as long as you are confident that it can be done effectively without being condescending, authoritarian, arrogant, or the like. Keep it light, keep it conversational, and try to state as many of the advantages of "your way" WITHOUT at the same time listing as many, let alone more, potential pitfalls of doing it "their way."
For many people, a criticism of their ideas (good or bad) is taken as a criticism or attack on them personally, and unless you have a very keen sense of diplomacy and the communication skills to get it across confidently and effectively in an email sight/client-unseen, I would be very hesitant to do it.
Unless of course, as you stated, you are willing to "throw away" the gig anyway!
