Weddings Rock wedding question

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BryanK

BryanK

DJ Extraordinaire
Mar 28, 2016
75
83
Colonial Beach, Virginia
Good day folks,

I thought I'd post my question here in hopes of receiving some advice on something. I booked a gig yesterday where the bride/groom want nothing but rock music. They are the ones paying, so normally I'd say "okay, deal, nothing but rock.", however having done a few weddings already for my fledgling company I've come to realize that everyone does not dance to, or even likes rock music.

So my question to you all is, should I incorporate some pop/dance music of some sort other than hip-hop (she says absolutely NO hip-hop) toward the latter portion of the reception, or should I just leave it alone? Maybe throw in some 80's 90's pop/dance mega hit songs that everyone knows?
 
What I would do is to have an open discussion with the client to explain to them what is going to happen at their wedding. The floor will stay empty and the folks that aren't all-Rock fans will be annoyed and will likely leave early. I'd probably do this via email, in order to let them stew on it a bit and also to make certain you have a written record of their directions. If they insist on proceeding, I'd probably not put out my biz cards and I'd make certain the other wedding vendors know what's going on. The client deserves to know, from the professional in this case, what they're about to do to their own wedding.
 
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Talking with the B&G is important as Ricky says, but also know that rock weddings do not have to be floor killers. It depends on the group. 3 years ago I did a NYE wedding for a "biker couple" their first dance was Metallica. 90% of their friends were rockers, so while I did play some newer tunes most of the night, as I remember, were rock songs.

But defining what "rock" means to them is important. Just like "hip hop" when a couple says that to me, no hip hop, but "Turn Down For What" is ok... the key is communication with your client. If you are "newer" to the biz, you will stumble from time to time learning what to say, what not to say and how to say it to fit your style.
 
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If you want, you can steal ideas from the one paragraph in the article I wrote here --
http://jimdproductions.com/Wedding-DJ-Tips-2016.pdf

Take a look at the middle of page 4, the paragraph just before the "Let the DJ Sell Themselves" heading.

"For example, not all music is danceable – while you may love AC/DC and Metallica, their songs will probably make for an awkward, or empty, dance floor."
 
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The other thing I wanted to mention--and I'm not suggesting you abandon talking some sense into the couple--but take this on as a challenge and see what danceable rock music you can track down. I'm not sure how specific they've gotten with you with regards to requests, but things like Bob Seger - Old Time Rock and Roll come to mind.

If you know the age of the couple, aim for some songs that were popular when they were in their middle school/high school/college years that they'll consider throwbacks and will carry some nostalgia for the core group of friends that will probably be at the wedding. That applies to any wedding and any genre... but in cases like this, you can pick songs that might normally be considered bad for a wedding reception, and they might work anyway because of the nostalgia factor. Plus, if you play a killer set that they love, they might not even notice when you slip in some non-rock songs!

I'm 28 years old... so for someone my age as far as rock I'd be thinking things like:

Third Eye Blind - Semi-Charmed Life
Offspring - Pretty Fly for a White Guy
Blink 182 - What's My Age Again, All the Small Things
Green Day - When I Come Around, Paradise
Barenaked Ladies - One Week
Mighty Mighty Bosstones - Impression That I Get
Red Hot Chili Peppers - Dani California
Weezer - Sweater Song, Buddy Holly
Fall Out Boy - Sugar We're Going Down
Sum 41 - Fat Lip
Smash Mouth - Walkin' on the Sun
Chumbawumba - Tubthumper

You get the idea!
 
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Great responses so far. I will say, that I learned long ago, from years of playing weddings with wedding bands, and also with rock/club bands that were often asked to do weddings-- that kind of thing rarely works. Every time a bride and groom have presented something like that to me since I've been concentrating on DJing, and I've been tempted to acquiesce, I've had to learn that lesson over again(!).

YOU are the music expert in this equation. You need to get them to trust your expertise and judgment. I will often remind them that "Yes, this is your wedding, and you should have things the way you want, but also remember, it's not only for you. You are really inviting all of these important people that you want to be a part of your day, and they have expectations too. You are getting married for your mother, father, grandparents, friends, etc., etc., and they may not want to hear as limited a selection as you have in-mind..."

Early on, I played a wedding that was a true disaster (like, fear for your life kind of stuff) because I listened to the bride and groom's "We only want rock" schpiel. Don't do it!!!!

GJ
 
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I did a "dead head" wedding last summer.

After talking with the Bride and groom like recommended above, I played lots of classic rock during dinner and cocktails

It's very important you understand what the couple is really looking for. Your idea of rock and theirs could be very different. Find out about their guests too.

Most people want their guests to have fun. Through discussion, you'll get an understanding. But it may end up being different that they Bride and groom are describing. Talk to them about that possibility and what you'd recommend you do if that happens

Some classic dead

Dancing, some good classic rock Songz that people could dance to

Sweet home Alabama

Danceable songs from:
Phish..bouncing around the room

Few dead songs

Stones, jumping jack flash, brown sugar

Marley..lots

Van Morrison, bright side of the road, brown Eyed Girl, Jackie Wilson, etc

Some jack Johnson stuff they liked

Rusted root, send me on my way, ecstasy.

Tom petty, American girl
 
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Man, you guys are ON IT! I'm going over ideas in my head on what questions to ask this bride, and recommendations to offer her. You all bring up great points that I will tactfully share via email to the bride soon (after I read Jim's article)! I'm really glad I joined this forum :humble:
 
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BryanK said:
Man, you guys are ON IT! I'm going over ideas in my head on what questions to ask this bride, and recommendations to offer her. You all bring up great points that I will tactfully share via email to the bride soon (after I read Jim's article)! I'm really glad I joined this forum :humble:
Click to expand...
We have our moments .. alas they tend to be fleeting so grab them when you can ...
 
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Rock is a broad category too as opposed to Classic Rock. I've seen Michael Jackson classified as Rock, so it depends on what your client considers rock, and you convincing her that most songs in that category aren't dance floor fillers.

I've been surprised but usually not. Last year a couple wanted Enter Sandman Metallica and the guests went crazy on the dance floor.
 
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She requested Classic Rock, Alternative (90's/early 2000's), Grunge, and plain 'ol Rock & Roll. I'm going to ask her about the age ranges and demographics of the guests, however I need to wait for her to return my wedding planning worksheet which will answer most of the specifics regarding those particular questions. I'm emailing her later today to see what kind of wiggle room, if any, that I have, and also explaining that "In my professional opinion" a non-stop barrage of rock may not go over well with some/most of the guests :)
 
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You may also simply want to ask her to supply a short list of what she likes to "dance" to. tell her "that way I can personalize the event to fill your dreams".... this may get her thinking.
 
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The last wedding I did before took my hiatus was all 80's music, and it sucked , the only time anyone dance was during the last 15 minutes of the night when I was given the ok to play what I wanted, and the first song I played, the few people that were left started dancing. I did everything I could to try and convince the couple to let me play songs from other era's. The dinner music was all Beetles, it was really strange as this was a young couple, I think they were 10 years younger than me maybe.

I did many request during the night , and I told them, this what the couple wanted, I am sorry, I can not play anything outside of that, I suggested they maybe they go talk to them and see if they might allow me to play your request, that didnt work either lol.
 
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It's all great advice but I'd take Chucks approach

Chuck The DJ said:
You may also simply want to ask her to supply a short list of what she likes to "dance" to. tell her "that way I can personalize the event to fill your dreams".... this may get her thinking.
Click to expand...

From my experience people that say no hip hop or no country are not really thinking about it that much. I had one last year that she had in big bold letters NO COUNTRY WHATSOEVER...Immediately under that was the playlist...1St dance God Bless The Broken Road, Father daughter mother son was My Wish and Bridal Party was Here For The Party by Gretchen Wilson. First three artists under that were Steve Earle, Shania Twain, and Allan Jackson....We had a long conversation about that lol

If they do want all rock I'm sure we could help you with some ideas for your list
 
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I may have to deal with this as well if I do ex co-workers wedding, he is into heavy metal, not sure I would even want to do a wedding having to play heavy metal all night long, defiantly not for a discounted rate, thats gotta get my full + 10% rate :D
 
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You may be surprised.
They might actually know their crowd better than you do!

At the multi-op, I was THEE guy for Rock and Roll weddings...so I have done some real barn burners!
Ones where the adults were just as much rockers as the youngins.

YES! You should have your talk with the B&G, but don't immediately poo-poo their dream.
Hear them out, then explain (as Rick said) that it COULD work against them.
By discussing it, you allow them to change their minds (the night of) if they see the floor is empty.
But just end the conversation with you on THEIR side...and offer to make a GO of it.
 
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