I believe this is another case of we have very different clients most of mine want to keep their guests happy and generally there are 50% or higher (usually higher more like 70-75%) over 40. Like you most of my gigs are referral or have seen me before I try to make nothing I do come as a surprise. That being said I do discuss music in consultations and try to give them exactly what they want. I would say the odds are fairly good that if they want the hip club like atmosphere I'm probably not getting the call
More often than not I hear just do what you do. I'll be willing to bet I don't make everyone happy every night but at the end of the 4 hours my percentages are pretty high. High energy doesn't necessarily mean new music it's more programming the music. How long does the average person stay on the floor for? If you get 10-12 minutes you're doing well we also have a generation and a half that has the attention span of a housefly I tend to rotate the floor a lot in the run of a night and there are several that I usually get young and old up for
These folks were 28 and 29 if I recall. The list they sent me had a first dance and F/D dance on it I did one 5 minute consultation they didn't want anything to do with picking music that was why they hired me (their words). I was in a barn venue with two distinct sides the only place I could setup was around a corner so for the most part I couldn''t see the floor. This is what it was like all night
View: https://www.facebook.com/jeffromard/videos/10159159930220096
I don't think you can say my clients don't want their guests happy... the difference is what will also make them and their friends happy. Many of us are set in our ways, and we tend to play a lot of the same old, until told otherwise. However, how can you be told otherwise, if you never allow that opportunity. Why would I ever risk playing country, if it wasn't something asked for. So for example... when I have my finalization this is the exact approach I take and exactly what I say:
- Early on most weddings I do, my couples try to accommodate older guests to let them know we didn't forget about them... do you guys want to incorporate songs that appeal to the older generatin throughout the night or just early on (I explain oldies are typically 80's and back): Answer typically is, yeah a few older songs are ok in the beginning, but not too much.
- Cool! So in that case, that typically means I'll mix a handful 3-4 here and 3-4 there in the early portions of the night, is that enough or are you looking for more? Just about all say, that's more than enough.
- Great! So as we progress through night, are you looking to create a "club like" atmosphere with a heavy emphasis on hip hop or EDM, or are you looking for more of what I call a bar atmosphere, where it's a variety of genres mixed in throughout the party and keeping everything familiar so you can sing along with it and maximize the amount of people on the dancefloor? 80% go for the bar style atmosphere where they like the variety and those sing along anthems.
- Perfect! So being that you have about 2.5hrs of dancing in your night, I typically recommend providing me about 15-25 dancing requests. This gives me a great insight as to the types of genres you want to incorporate as well as ensuring I play your favorites that you've been looking forward to on your wedding day. Oh perfect! That should be no problem!
Now once in a blue moon, I get the same "oh we trust you", and that's fine, but I at least took some preliminary steps to gauge how they want their night to go. Many couples do give me requests, because I emphasize how it helps me determine what styles to incorporate and what gets them excited. And I agree, new doesn't always mean more energy... the energy is from the collective group. I simply take the genres and styles they appreciate and from there create the best party I can. For examples, by taking requests I can see if they know the latest and best, or if the requests are more of "standards"... knowing what they're into and familiar with will determine whether I'll incorporate the more riskier songs that only certain groups might know.
There's one thing that caught my attention in what you said... and that's something along the lines of what constitutes as doing a good job, and how you rotate the floor and 10-12 of dancing shows you're doing well. I invite you to come to my weddings, bc you'll see once we get to that after dinner dance set, the majority of my guests don't leave the dancefloor.
I spend 1.5-2hrs at my finalizations... there's a lot I learn about my couples I feel, and it allows me to create a more personalized experience. I don't think I actually get booked because I play the latest and best or am super high energy (some of my events are more low key)... my reputation is more of being a true professional and creating a night tailored around the couple and their group of family and friends... as opposed to being generic and incorporating things, that while they may work, they might not care for.