Weddings Wedding Song List

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Esoteric

New DJ
Oct 13, 2008
1,650
0
44
Texas
www.esotericvisions.com
Okay, this would be a good place to ask this.

My fiance and I were talking about our wedding reception the other day. Now, as an artist I know from time to time I can be offended when people don't trust my professional judgment. But.......

My fiance and I have very specific ideas about the music we want (we are Christians and want 75% Christian music, with the rest being country, rock, and crooners) and don't want (no rap, no booty shaking music, no hip hop, no R&B). Do you guys think it would be offensive for us to go to the DJ with a list of 20-25 songs that we certainly want to hear, then a list of 40-60 songs for the DJ to choose from to fill in the rest, and inform him that we don't want him taking requests?

Would that offend your artistic sensibilities?

Should we offer to supply any music not on their play lists (since most DJs we have talked to only have 5-10% of our songs on their available music) or should we wait for them to ask?

Mike
 
My customers do that all the time.

I ask for 15 to 20 must plays and a list of other songs the client would like me to pick songs.

I have done a number of weddings similar. I find they are very easy.

I also have a number of clients ask me not to take request.

Many times when the guest figure out they are not going to have fun dance music they just leave early.

Selective music programming can be hard because it can make the DJ look like he is not doing a good job to the guest.


That all being said with a larger possible songs list a good DJ will do their best to sort though the songs and pick the best songs that will make people dance.


As a DJ most likely I would refuse a event with 75% Christian Music. There are people that specialize in these types of events, you might want to try and find one in your area.


Hope I helped. Good luck with your event and best wishes for a happy marriage.
 
DJ Cam said:
My customers do that all the time.

I ask for 15 to 20 must plays and a list of other songs the client would like me to pick songs.

I have done a number of weddings similar. I find they are very easy.

I also have a number of clients ask me not to take request.

Many times when the guest figure out they are not going to have fun dance music they just leave early.

Selective music programming can be hard because it can make the DJ look like he is not doing a good job to the guest.


That all being said with a larger possible songs list a good DJ will do their best to sort though the songs and pick the best songs that will make people dance.


As a DJ most likely I would refuse a event with 75% Christian Music. There are people that specialize in these types of events, you might want to try and find one in your area.


Hope I helped. Good luck with your event and best wishes for a happy marriage.
Click to expand...

Good point!! I never even thought of someone refusing to play Christian music. We will have to ask about that. We made sure to have a good mix of slow dance music, faster music, etc. But that is very helpful!

Thanks!

Mike
 
Esoteric said:
Okay, this would be a good place to ask this.

My fiance and I were talking about our wedding reception the other day. Now, as an artist I know from time to time I can be offended when people don't trust my professional judgment. But.......

My fiance and I have very specific ideas about the music we want (we are Christians and want 75% Christian music, with the rest being country, rock, and crooners) and don't want (no rap, no booty shaking music, no hip hop, no R&B). Do you guys think it would be offensive for us to go to the DJ with a list of 20-25 songs that we certainly want to hear, then a list of 40-60 songs for the DJ to choose from to fill in the rest, and inform him that we don't want him taking requests?

Would that offend your artistic sensibilities?

Should we offer to supply any music not on their play lists (since most DJs we have talked to only have 5-10% of our songs on their available music) or should we wait for them to ask?

Mike
Click to expand...
Whats wrong with R&B? There are some great songs for Weddings such as "Here and Now" by Luther Vandross. "One in a Million" by Larry Graham etc
 
It's not so much that a DJ would refuse to play Christian music, as much as it's out of the mainstream, therefore unlikely that the typical DJ would own the music you're asking for.

You're best off looking for a DJ that specializes in Christian music. Such a DJ would not only have what you're asking for, but would be pre-dispositioned to not play mainstream music that Christians would find offensive.

For what it's worth, I'm not the kind of DJ you're looking for, but I know several. Most of them are members of CrossMix - find one near you at www.crossmix.com
 
I turned down a wedding reception because they wanted mostly Christian music - its no different that me turning down an all country wedding - there are DJ's out there that specialize in that market. It is harder to find a speciality dj, but they do exist.
 
ahoustondj said:
Whats wrong with R&B? There are some great songs for Weddings such as "Here and Now" by Luther Vandross. "One in a Million" by Larry Graham etc
Click to expand...

Nothing "wrong" with it. We just don't like it. I hate Luther Vandross and she is not a Larry Graham fan. It just goes down the list. *lol* Just a taste thing.

Mike
 
Thanks guys! This is great stuff we never thought of!

We thought we could just give the DJ the music in whatever form he wanted (we own all of it). Is there something wrong with that or is it just offensive? I know I would be asking him to be a button monkey in a sense, that is why I was asking how you guys as professional DJs felt.

But we certainly want a professional DJ for their professionalism, their ability to interact and keep the party going, and their feel of the event. We are just very particular about our music.

But thanks guys this is good stuff!

Do you have any other hints? We are looking to do decoration of the space, lighting wise and stuff (uplights, etc) do you guys generally have enough lighting gear to do a room that seats 300+?

Do you guys normally have access to pipe and drape? I am finding out reading here that DJs provide more services than I thought.

Mike
 
Esoteric said:
Thanks guys! This is great stuff we never thought of!

We thought we could just give the DJ the music in whatever form he wanted (we own all of it). Is there something wrong with that or is it just offensive? I know I would be asking him to be a button monkey in a sense, that is why I was asking how you guys as professional DJs felt.

But we certainly want a professional DJ for their professionalism, their ability to interact and keep the party going, and their feel of the event. We are just very particular about our music.

But thanks guys this is good stuff!

Do you have any other hints? We are looking to do decoration of the space, lighting wise and stuff (uplights, etc) do you guys generally have enough lighting gear to do a room that seats 300+?

Do you guys normally have access to pipe and drape? I am finding out reading here that DJs provide more services than I thought.

Mike
Click to expand...

Get an Ipod! :sqeek:
 
Esoteric said:
Thanks guys! This is great stuff we never thought of!

We thought we could just give the DJ the music in whatever form he wanted (we own all of it). Is there something wrong with that or is it just offensive? I know I would be asking him to be a button monkey in a sense, that is why I was asking how you guys as professional DJs felt.

But we certainly want a professional DJ for their professionalism, their ability to interact and keep the party going, and their feel of the event. We are just very particular about our music.

But thanks guys this is good stuff!

Do you have any other hints? We are looking to do decoration of the space, lighting wise and stuff (uplights, etc) do you guys generally have enough lighting gear to do a room that seats 300+?

Do you guys normally have access to pipe and drape? I am finding out reading here that DJs provide more services than I thought.

Mike
Click to expand...

Mike - Many dj's might be offended...I've done exactly that; played from a pre-picked list, albeit it was mainstream music. My job was to put it together in a manner that would have the music flow; get the party going and keep it going...Luckily the clients picked some great music.....

Are you OK if the music picked doesn't go over? Will it bother you if your guests aren't having a good time? Are you prepared to let the DJ use his experience if your choice of music doesn't go over.

You want their feel, their professionalism, yet by taking away the right to program the music...you essentially have stripped them of the very thing you want.

"We are just very particular about our music."

Who is the reception for? Are you guests not particular as well?

Mike....I'm not trying to be rude or disrespectful......just playing devils advocate. I think there needs to be some compromise so that everyone has a fantastic time.....
 
Esoteric said:
We thought we could just give the DJ the music in whatever form he wanted (we own all of it). Is there something wrong with that or is it just offensive? I know I would be asking him to be a button monkey in a sense, that is why I was asking how you guys as professional DJs felt.
Click to expand...
That's probably what provoked ahoustondj to tell you to get an iPod. If you're going to provide the music, and if you're going to want it in your own particular order, than an iPod is not a bad choice.

However, that's NOT what you want. You need someone who will not only play your selections, but put them in the right order to create the energy and party atmosphere you're looking for.


Esoteric said:
Do you have any other hints? We are looking to do decoration of the space, lighting wise and stuff (uplights, etc) do you guys generally have enough lighting gear to do a room that seats 300+?

Do you guys normally have access to pipe and drape? I am finding out reading here that DJs provide more services than I thought.
Click to expand...
Lighting, most of us can handle. Pipe & drape? Probably not, but no harm in asking.
 
I ask the customer to pick songs they would want for their event.I will play some of my stuff. I always try to make the customer happy.
 
thatmusicguy said:
Mike - Many dj's might be offended...I've done exactly that; played from a pre-picked list, albeit it was mainstream music. My job was to put it together in a manner that would have the music flow; get the party going and keep it going...Luckily the clients picked some great music.....

Are you OK if the music picked doesn't go over? Will it bother you if your guests aren't having a good time? Are you prepared to let the DJ use his experience if your choice of music doesn't go over.

You want their feel, their professionalism, yet by taking away the right to program the music...you essentially have stripped them of the very thing you want.

"We are just very particular about our music."

Who is the reception for? Are you guests not particular as well?

Mike....I'm not trying to be rude or disrespectful......just playing devils advocate. I think there needs to be some compromise so that everyone has a fantastic time.....
Click to expand...

Great questions! If no one had a good time I hardly think the music would be to blame. I mean it isn't as if we are offering restrictions like no slow dancing, or things like that. The DJ would have access to a wide variety of music. But no, I would not blame the DJ. As I said having been in that situation as an LD I would not want a poor looking play blamed on me when I was not the one who actually designed the lights.

As I said we were looking at a long list of songs for him to choose from. Any and every kind of song is available in Christian music. Plus add a little country and some crooners and there should be every kind music available.

I guess I want them to use their feel to move things along, when to play slow and when to play fast, etc as well as interaction to keep things going, but just keep the music non-offensive. Part of the problem is that we have a different idea of offensive than society as a whole at this particular time.

As far as who it is for we thought of that. That is why we are playing any secular music at all. If it was for us, we would play 100% Christian music. But we recognize there are others out there who don't love Christian music. Ultimately we came to the conclusion that we wanted the reception to be a reflection of us and who we are.

This is all good conversation. I am not easily offended. If I didn't want every view I wouldn't ask.

Mike
 
DJ Teddy Bear said:
That's probably what provoked ahoustondj to tell you to get an iPod. If you're going to provide the music, and if you're going to want it in your own particular order, than an iPod is not a bad choice.

However, that's NOT what you want. You need someone who will not only play your selections, but put them in the right order to create the energy and party atmosphere you're looking for.


Lighting, most of us can handle. Pipe & drape? Probably not, but no harm in asking.
Click to expand...

Oh! Let me clarify we have no opinions on order. We know what we want (and don't want) to hear, but we want the DJ to use his judgment on what would be good to play when to keep the party going, slow it down, mellow it out, or ramp it up.

Mike
 
Steve -

I think this situation is different. Mike isn't merely particular about the music, but has spiritual reasons for being so.



Mike -

If you search this message board, you'll find threads that speak of DJs feeling hand-cuffed buy requests such as yours. They were told they had to play off the list, and only off the list, and the list sucked and the party sucked... until the client took the hand-cuffs off and let the DJ "do his thing".

I'm sure that your requests don't suck, but they are simply not the kinds of songs a typical DJ, or a typical wedding guest, would be used to.

Get a DJ that is experienced / specializes in Christian music, and the party won't suck.
 
Esoteric said:
Oh! Let me clarify we have no opinions on order. We know what we want (and don't want) to hear, but we want the DJ to use his judgment on what would be good to play when to keep the party going, slow it down, mellow it out, or ramp it up.
Click to expand...
I know I'm beginning to sound like a broken record...

But these are the reasons you need a DJ experienced / specializing in Christian music, and not someone whom you merely provide all the music for.
 
I agree with Teddy and specialized. However I dont agree that the specialized DJ will have any further success. If your crowd doesnt know this music or hasnt been to a few christian party of such they will likely sit in their seats during a Christian Country Song even if they are avid country fans. Why you ask? Cause folks dance to stuff they are familiar with especially those who love Dancing. For instance if someone asks for salsa or cha cha and you play one they dont recognize. The dance floor will only enjoy the presence of the lighting. I love playing Christian based music its fresh exhilirating and a nice change. I do two or three a yr. geared in this direction.
 
There's a significant difference between "Christian Music" which is an established genre (with branches into various types under the Christian heading) and "non-offensive music", which is utterly subjective.
 
Steve - I totally agree. They are different. And 'offensive' can be VERY subjective.

However, Esoteric wants Christian AND doesn't want 'offensive'.

Would you agree that a DJ that specializes in Christian music would probably already have a good feeling for what song would be classified by this client as 'offensive' ?

That's what I meant in my first post when I said:
DJ Teddy Bear said:
You're best off looking for a DJ that specializes in Christian music. Such a DJ would not only have what you're asking for, but would be pre-dispositioned to not play mainstream music that Christians would find offensive.
Click to expand...
 
DJ Teddy Bear said:
Steve - I totally agree. They are different. And 'offensive' can be VERY subjective.

However, Esoteric wants Christian AND doesn't want 'offensive'.

Would you agree that a DJ that specializes in Christian music would probably already have a good feeling for what song would be classified by this client as 'offensive' ?

That's what I meant in my first post when I said:
Click to expand...

I think you are right on Teddy. What we want I think is someone who understands us and where we are coming from. I think if we had that connection then we would be more willing to "take off the hand-cuffs" so to speak and only specify 10-15 songs we want to hear and then let them go on the fly with everything else.

I think that the problem we have had so far is DJs (we have only met with two) suggesting things that society in general would not find offensive but that us and the majority of our guests would (the majority of our guests are Christians).

For example after meeting with a DJ and going over our requests and such, he had "Don't Phunk With My Heart" on a suggested play list. First of all we hate The Black Eyed Peas, the majority of our guests wouldn't even know it, and we even found the title offensive, much less the song.

That is when we came to the idea of a list of songs.

But we will certainly check out Christian DJs that is a great suggestion.

But just as a point of clarification why assume that limiting the play list to Christian music (with the smattering of country and crooner music) would make the party suck? I can't think of any type of song that you can find in secular music that you can't find in Christian music.

As far as familiarity keep in mind that 95% of our guests will be Christians. They listen to Christian radio and go to Christian concerts. We figured we should cater to the 95% and not the 5%.

Anyway, great discussion guys! Thanks!

Mike
 
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