Handling your absolute "No Go" zone

wifedj

DJ Extraordinaire
Mar 20, 2008
2,439
3,199
To be fair...you did choose the name "Wife"

cc
Its an acronym, not a name. See explanatory post siggy...1565297516300.png.

...but you still when all-in-homo on your own!
 

RobDawg

DJ
Jan 21, 2019
10
15
40
Here in Washington State if you turn down a wedding for the reasons in the opening post the Attorney General will sue you. Happened to a florist who refused to work for a same-sex wedding and the florist lost. Always best to say "I'm not available" when turning down any gig for any reason. If you're the kind of person who may have a problem taking on any wedding for moral, religious, etc reasons do your homework on the couple first before replying to any inquiry. You can learn a lot by a simple instagram or facebook search. Also helps when selling your services, maybe they're a Mariners fan and you can talk about this isn't their year, or they have a Golden Retriever and guess what, so do you! LOL
 

EERobert

DJ Extraordinaire
Aug 11, 2013
404
616
Hays, Kansas, United States
I've never turned down a gig, but I have had some redflags go off. I once had a groom tell me I better not play any [insert racial slur here] music. As someone in a trans-racial family (my sister is African-American, my brother is Latinx) I almost turned down the job, but decided to keep my head low and do the job, particularly since I work for a company and didn't want to cause waves. Now that I've been with them for 7 years, I'm a bit more comfortable saying "this person said this in the pre-call I'm not comfortable" etc.

I have no problems doing Avon events or Same-Sex weddings. There are events where I'm not comfortable, mainly because of the style of music they may want, but I ask questions to try and get a better handle.
 

MIXMASTERMACHOM

DJ Extraordinaire
Oct 16, 2011
9,418
1,314
61
I've never turned down a gig, but I have had some redflags go off. I once had a groom tell me I better not play any [insert racial slur here] music. As someone in a trans-racial family (my sister is African-American, my brother is Latinx) I almost turned down the job, but decided to keep my head low and do the job, particularly since I work for a company and didn't want to cause waves. Now that I've been with them for 7 years, I'm a bit more comfortable saying "this person said this in the pre-call I'm not comfortable" etc.

I have no problems doing Avon events or Same-Sex weddings. There are events where I'm not comfortable, mainly because of the style of music they may want, but I ask questions to try and get a better handle.
Did you have an event not go well because you didn't play quite the music they were looking to hear since you said you have done events where you're not to familiar with a certain style of music?
 

EERobert

DJ Extraordinaire
Aug 11, 2013
404
616
Hays, Kansas, United States
I've had a few events where either the Bride or the groom has been Latinx and the other Caucasian. I usually end up with dueling requests. I play Cumbrias or Tejano music, the rednecks get mad and demand I play classic rock or country. I play classic rock or country and those that want to dance to Latin music get mad and request more Latin music.

I usually ask the bride and groom how much of a mix they want (60/40? 50/50?) and explain that I usually do 3 or 4 songs in one style and move to a different style, so depending on the mix they want (say they want a 70/30 mix of English to Spanish songs)that's what I'll plan on. What has happened, a couple of times, is the guests get drunk and only want to hear/dance to what they like and not what other guests want/like.

Of course this happens at all types of dances, I just did one this last weekend where I started off with AC/DC and some older gentlemen (mid to late 50s) was demanding I stop playing this hard rock or I was going to lose all the old people. But the dances where they want Latin music stands out to me in particular because I don't know or listen to that type of music.
 

MIXMASTERMACHOM

DJ Extraordinaire
Oct 16, 2011
9,418
1,314
61
So is there an event that any won't do because you don't like that style of music or you're not familiar with that style of music? For example some clients and their guest want you to play some hardcore stuff. Stuff with cursing in it and so on. I try my best today to stay away from doing such an event. Let another DJ who doesn't have a problem with that do the event.
 

rickryan.com

DJ Extraordinaire
Dec 9, 2009
16,717
13,373
55
Hendersonville, TN
www.RickRyan.com
I usually ask the bride and groom how much of a mix they want (60/40? 50/50?) and explain that I usually do 3 or 4 songs in one style and move to a different style,
3-4 of the same genre will often tick off guests, in my humble opinion. Asking what mix they want is good but my standard is that I'm trying to tap every person in the room within each 4 song cycle. I'm constantly flipping genres and tempos, to try and keep everyone happy. I know some people think that's too much flipping but it seems to work for me. YMMV
 
  • Like
Reactions: dunlopj

EERobert

DJ Extraordinaire
Aug 11, 2013
404
616
Hays, Kansas, United States
3-4 of the same genre will often tick off guests, in my humble opinion. Asking what mix they want is good but my standard is that I'm trying to tap every person in the room within each 4 song cycle. I'm constantly flipping genres and tempos, to try and keep everyone happy. I know some people think that's too much flipping but it seems to work for me. YMMV
My expirence is that people (at least in my area) want 3 to 4 songs in one genre. So I'll go 3 classic rock songs, 3 country songs, etc. Any more than that, people get tired and want something fresh.

There are, of course, some exceptions to the rule, I've got a wedding coming up where they want mostly country music, but this is what I've found crowds in my area want