Attended my first Zoom wedding today

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rickryan.com

DJ Extraordinaire
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www.RickRyan.com
That's not true in practice however, and here's why:



Now, thanks to Zoom people can virtually invite every acquaintance they can think of with no cost or risk while simultaneously expecting wedding gifts from all. Once again we place the ability to monetize a connection over the social value of real relationships. Just read the 'Dear Abby" columns and you'll find a regular pattern of people faced with this exact dilemma of how to respond to invitations fully aware that absent this virtual realm they would never have been on the guests list.

I'm not speaking to the personalities in the specific event described, because I don't know any of the people involved. nor do I think every instance of social media is void of value between people who are already deeply connected in the real world. Rather, I'm commenting on the social media trend in general and how as a society we have grown MORE separated, more discontent, more abrasive, more toxic, and more violent as a result of social media. Social media is not connecting people with each other. It is connecting people with a mirror of themselves and when (as is always the case) it fails to reflect what they ultimately desire - we as a community become more anti-social both online and in the real world.
In my experience, 20-something females often will ignore real relationship when money is involved. Money dances are a prime example. While they're acceptable in some areas/families, in this area it's pretty universally thought that the girl is attempting a shakedown of the family. I see the Zoom option as just another opportunity to cast their nets wider and few will give a second thought towards the relationship aspect of their wider circle.
 
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djcrazychris

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Ive been to 4 zoom funerals and 1 zoom wedding in the past 2 months... We have all of our religious services on Zoom (3 a week)... which i am head of the tech team in charge... in the begining i did some social zooming with friends... at this point i am sooooooooooooooooooo sick of it... i am on it when i have to be... but will never CHOOSE to go on for "fun"

cc
 

Ausumm

No Matter Where You Go... There You Are!
Oct 21, 2008
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But being there in person at the ceremony, typically a religious sacrament/ritual, is monumentally more important than pretending skype/zoom is in anyway meaningful or a substitute for human interaction, particularly at the most important and meaningful human acts of love and commitment. We witness and affirm and support and acknowledge in person not by proxy or through some detached, reclusive, sterile video conference.
My parents celebrated their 60th anniversary in April.
Much like a wedding, my sister and I made big plans for a big gathering,
and my family intended on traveling to Western PA to surprise mom and dad.
We ended up settling for a video conference.

Is it a detached, reclusive, sterile way to go?
ABSOLUTELY!

Would have all of us preferred to be there in person?
ABSOLUTELY!

But with my parents being in their 80's, and 6 hours away...
I am happy to settle for any interaction I can get.

I'd rather appreciate the opportunity, than to criticize the method.
 

djrox

Sir Wyzazz
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Aug 12, 2006
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I'd rather appreciate the opportunity, than to criticize the method.
You say criticize, I say communicate.

Your take is noted and I agree it is something slightly better than nothing...but just barely better.

How many times have we heard the more often than not self defeating, surrender mantra, "Something is better than nothing," in this very forum?

When we surrender to fear based on ignorance and detrimental reliance, we often settle for slightly better than nothing...unfortunately.

Surrender is a choice.

We can also choose to resist and even reject such conditioning less we march silently, calmly and foolishly to our own demise. I choose not to surrender.

I would have made the 6 hour drive to be with my aging parents, in person, unless I were absolutely contagious as established by a medical examination as opposed to adherence to some cultural narrative, because it may be a fleeting opportunity to do so, ever again.

However, this is currently a free country and you are free to march as you choose.

P.S. I cannot imagine not hugging my family because of fear and virtue signalling based on edicts from bureaucratic experts and politically motivated "leaders" that have been incorrect, recently and repeatedly, specifically regarding the current health crisis, and who's motives have often proven to be untrustworthy.
 
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Ausumm

No Matter Where You Go... There You Are!
Oct 21, 2008
11,217
12,680
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Bethlehem PA
You say criticize, I say communicate.

Your take is noted and I agree it is something slightly better than nothing...but just barely better.

How many times have we heard the more often than not self defeating, surrender mantra, "Something is better than nothing," in this very forum?

When we surrender to fear based on ignorance and detrimental reliance, we often settle for slightly better than nothing...unfortunately.

Surrender is a choice.

We can also choose to resist and even reject such conditioning less we march silently, calmly and foolishly to our own demise. I choose not to surrender.

I would have made the 6 hour drive to be with my aging parents, in person, unless I were absolutely contagious as established by a medical examination as opposed to adherence to some cultural narrative, because it may be a fleeting opportunity to do so, ever again.

However, this is currently a free country and you are free to march as you choose.

P.S. I cannot imagine not hugging my family because of fear and virtue signalling based on edicts from bureaucratic experts and politically motivated "leaders" that have been incorrect, recently and repeatedly, specifically regarding the current health crisis, and who's motives have often proven to be untrustworthy.
Okay...so I play it YOUR way.

What if I am wrong?

My parents are in their 80's, and I don't want to be the one who kills them.
Call it what you want, but I can live with that.
So can my parents.
 

djrox

Sir Wyzazz
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Aug 12, 2006
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Okay...so I play it YOUR way.

What if I am wrong?

My parents are in their 80's, and I don't want to be the one who kills them.
Call it what you want, but I can live with that.
So can my parents.
See, I was right, you are free to choose...based on whatever criteria you accept.